Finding Confidence


In Him

I often have “those days”.

I wake up, immediately check my Instagram feed, full of crisp clean photos of everyone out there that is “cooler than me”. Steamy cups of coffee that taste better than mine. Cozy quilts that are more comfy than the one I sleep under. Breakfast plates that are healthier than the leftover cookie I grabbed running out the door.

It seems like I live in a world where comparison is the native language.

Does anyone else feel this way? As women, we often fall into the trap of envy, comparison, and insecurities before we even know it. We see an outfit we love, so we wish we could have it. We see another young woman, walking with confidence and professionalism, and we begin telling ourselves we aren’t “as good as her”.

“As good” – what does that even mean? And who determines the value of “good” in our society? Or more importantly, in our own hearts?

            Confidence can be defined a million different ways, by a million different people, but I believe it’s more abstract than many like to think. It is that inner “knowing” that despite our outward circumstances, we are going to be okay. Not only okay, but good, and maybe even better than before.

Confidence, from ourselves, can come in waves.

I cannot say I wake up every morning feeling as though I’ve already conquered the day ahead of me.

Some days, I wake up and would rather stay in bed. Sometimes, I look down at the floor, instead of making eye contact with the girl from my class as I walk by in the hallway. These choices are not based on simple preference, but come from a deep voice within me saying, “What are they going to think of you? How can you trust yourself to do this?”

But as I was preparing for this article, I noticed something that I hadn’t before – confidence has little to do with me and everything to do with my Father. It has little to do with how I feel and everything to do with how He feels about me. I began asking myself, “Who does He say that I am?”

I am beloved. I am a daughter of the King. I am treasured. I am new. I am redeemed. I am a friend. I am free.

            My Father is with me wherever I go. And He is with you, too. Always. His Word says, “Be strong and courageous, do not be afraid or tremble at them, for the LORD your God is the one who goes with you He will not fail you or forsake you.” (Deut. 1:6). His goodness and faithfulness are constant – unwavering.

And so our confidence is constant too, because we do not find it within ourselves, but in Him.

He is for us, and as certain as the sun rising in the morning, so His love and affection are for us. And because of this, next time you are having one of “those days” and you hear yourself saying, “What will they think of me?”, remind yourself of what He thinks of you – you, beloveds, are His creation, fearfully and wonderfully formed to do great things in His kingdom.


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